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Forum:2005-04-25. (fanfic) Shipping and Handling - Lila Sawyer, by King Cheetah
King Cheetah, 25/04/2005 12:16 AM :Shipping and Handling --> Lila Sawyer by King Cheetah While everybody loves Raymond, evidently NOBODY loves Lila... well, Arnold maybe but I'll get to that in a bit. This has always rather baffled me because if you watch the episodes very carefully, you really don't have much reason to hate her. Introduced in the second season in "Ms Perfect" (episode #206) it wouldn't be for another year in "Arnold and Lila" (episode #314) that she'd start getting up the nose of dedicated Arnold/Helga shippers. All told she' only prominently featured in six episodes involving Arnold: Episode #206 - Ms. Perfect Episode #313 - Arnold and Lila Episode #318 - School Play Episode #407 - Love and Cheese Episode #411 - Weird Cousin Episode #502 - Helga's Masquerade Episode #503 - Big Sis Episode #517 - Timberly Loves Arnold Episode #517 - Eugene, Eugene! I opted not to include "#511 - Arnold Visits Arnie" and "#514 - Married" because Lila is a weird dream world version of herself and not really related to the actual character in the show. Having pretty much written Ruth Mc Dougal out of the major plot threads in "Arnold's Valentine", the writers needed another foil for Helga, and therein lies a point that I think many fans and fictioneers overlook; Lila isn't a character, she's a plot device. Her soul purpose in the show is to be a focus for Arnold's pointless obsessions (dude, no means NO!), and a focus for Helga's teeth grinding, but is this warranted? Well... After "Arnold and Lila" , our resident redhead spent the rest of her episodes asking Arnold to please keep his hand's to himself (LITERALLY in the case of "Weird Cousin"). She is also only one of two people that Helga has actually confessed her feelings for Arnold to (and yes, while Phoebe obviously knows, at no time does Helga actually come out and tell her). So then, what to do with Lila in your fanfics? Hmmmm... 1) "Shut Ub... Ah'm Nawt Drunk an' You're Ever Sho Shtupid!" Like Phoebe, puberty could be either kind or cruel to Ms. Sawyer and knowing you guys, it'll probably be the latter. She might be pretty and easy going (not little miss popular, a welcome part of the crowd) or possibly near sighted, acne scarred and with 18 lbs of braces jutting from her gums. Likewise, it's easy to imagine her peaking somewhere in the sixth or seventh grade and having a rough time of it in high school, and just like Phoebe, I see her not dealing with not being exceptional very well. From here you could split into two camps of thought; White Lila and Black Lila and the possible story hooks for both are pretty mouth watering. Either way, you could see her getting into and out of trouble just like any of the other girls in the cast. 2) "Here Helga, you and Arnold take MY concert tickets..." White Lila, pretty, pleasant, modest and funny. Always good for a favor or to just listen to your problems... pretty much as they wrote her in the show. While I imagine her being less annoying in manner by the time her freshman year rolls around, you could still have fun playing off her naiveté and innocence. From Sid, Park and Stinky would be ceaselessly macking on her and might fall prey to the dishonest intentions of roguish sophomores (horrors!). You could have all manner of fun as Helga, Rhonda or Sheena work to keep her out of trouble. Alternately, she becomes Rhonda's right hand girl as she attempts to break into all the right cliques in this and the higher grades. I also REALLY like pairing up Helga and Lila as best friends, as you'll see in "Lonely Girls" and a few other upcoming stories. Whatever happens, I just hope she starts dressing better... 3) "Now Rhonda, on your knees and beg for the privilege of licking my shoes..." Black Lila; To Mega Thereon, the dragon lady, the spider queen. Gossamer fine are her intrigues and subtle are her foul schemes. Guileful and cunning, she is the Fu Manchu of the high school and no bit of villainy that happens does not bare her mark. She would come into conflict with any of our heroes only if they got in the way of something she wanted. Rhonda could fall prey to her desire for social dominance, Phoebe becoming her indentured homework slave, and Helga the constant thorn in her side as she undoes her plots one by one. Okay, a little over the top, but what the hey, if you have your heart set on Lila as the heavy, why pussyfoot around. The real story ideas would be similar to the above, only to a lesser degree, most probably butting heads with Rhonda constantly over who'll rule as Miss Popularity. 4) "Um Helga, why must I buy your condoms?" Okay then, let's think outside the box, shall we? In "Lonely Girls", I set up a rather plausible condition for Helga and Lila becoming best friends, caught between the Olympian conflicts of Rhonda and her social Magog, Katrinka. In "Ball and Chain" Helga the struggling writer is sharing an apartment with Lila the exotic dancer. In "P.S. 218" Lila is Helga's Jiminy Cricket, being the voice of reason in preventing our favorite blonde bombshell from getting into too much trouble. If you think about it, you can have A LOT of fun with Lila without having to build the case that now all of the sudden she needs Arnold like she needs air. I've also got a little something cooking involving Lila and Phoebe called "A Murder Of Crows", but you'll just have to wait for that one. ^__- Anyone else have any thoughts on this? ---- Cool, 25/04/2005 11:30 AM :While everybody loves Raymond, evidently NOBODY loves Lila :Whoo, rim-shot! :Her soul purpose in the show is to be a focus for Arnold's pointless obsessions (dude, no means NO!), and a focus for Helga's teeth grinding, but is this warranted? Well... After "Arnold and Lila" , our resident redhead spent the rest of her episodes asking Arnold to please keep his hand's to himself (LITERALLY in the case of "Weird Cousin"). :That Arnold, he's a horndog :) :Man - the way to write your posts, so...good - yeah, i can't come up with any other word, i should really check out your fics, as i bet I'd enjoy them. :1) "Shut Ub... Ah'm Nawt Drunk an' You're Ever Sho Shtupid!" :Heee-heee-heee-heee. :-I like your comparisions of white and black Lila. :4) "Um Helga, why must I buy your condoms?" :WTF? :Helga the struggling writer is sharing an apartment with Lila the exotic dancer. :Sounds like a sitcom FOX would run. :Gotta go - this is my only day off, and i have alot of errans to run! :steve